Tag: Care

Day 01 – Best book you read last year

dawnawakening:

After much deliberation (lying on my bed staring at the ceiling for 10 minutes) I have chosen the Phedre Trilogy from Jacqueline Carey’s Kushiel’s Legacy. Yes, I know that it’s three books but if you read them all one after the other, like I did, then they count as one. Logic.

Carey has created a world in these books that seems so real and rich in back story that you’re sure there should be history books out there about the land of Terre D’Ange. The characters that she created are equally rich in personal history and beautifully crafted in such a way that you can care for even the most hateful villian.

The trilogy follows Phedre from an unwanted orphan to the savior of her home lands that are poised on the edge of war. All along the way friendships are made and broken, relationships are kindled and put out, enemies are created and cut down.

The characters in these books quickly became some of my all time favourites, not only for their strengths but for their multitudes of weaknesses as well. (I may be 100% in love with Josceline Verreuil)

Disclaimer: These aren’t bed time stories to read to your kids. The whole axis that this epic tale revolves around is the fact that Phedre is marked by the angel Kushiel meaning that she finds pleasure in pain. Get where this is going? 50 Shades ain’t got nothing on these books. But know that Carey uses this element in her stories as a means to an end, a tool for Phedre to use to her advantage, not as the central focus.

Jacqueline Carey / Kushiel’s Dart

sexartandpolitics:

“Whip us till we’re on the floor, we’ll turn around and ask for more, we’re Phedre’s Boys!”

“We like to hurt, we like to bleed, daily floggings do we need, we’re Phedre’s Boys!”

“Man or woman, we don’t care; give us twins, we’ll take the pair! But just because we let you beat us; doesn’t mean you can defeat us!”

Perfect.

You have to love their song, but their loss will break your heart

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We’re prepared to scribe up,” Bella said. “And then we’ve asked for Last Meal on special service, because we’re doing movie day upstairs in the theater.” “ Magic Mike XXL just came out on DVD,” Beth chimed in. “We have a moral obligation to support the arts, even if they’re just the human ones.” “I haven’t seen the first one,” Autumn murmured. “They tell me his pelvis is double-jointed. Is that true?” Beth came forward and took the Neverfull. “Come on, you look like you need a girls’ night. Payne and Xhex are joining us. So are Cormia, Layla, Doc Jane, and Ehlena. We’re getting all of us the friendship that was being offered. It seemed … too frivolous when she thought about all she wasn’t able to do for that unknown female. Bella leaned in. “We’ve told the males that they can’t come in. Mostly because if they see that Channing guy up on the big screen—” Beth finished, “—we’re going to need to do a remodel after they’re done with things.” “Back to the double-jointed business,” Autumn kicked in. “I mean, how does he walk?” “Very well, my friend.” As Bella answered Tohr’s mate, she put an arm around Marissa’s shoulders. “Very, very well.” As Marissa let herself get drawn into the billiards room—where ink pots had been set up on one of the coffee tables and there was already a glass set out for her—she began to blink fast. Part of the emotion was the fact that that female who had died wasn’t ever going to have anything like this again—if she’d been lucky enough to find good people surrounding her while she’d been alive. The other half was a gratitude so great, her chest could barely contain the emotion. “Ladies,” she said, putting her arm around Bella’s waist. “Let’s do the addressing quickly—so we can get to the undressing.”…“I ’m sorry … they’re doing what ?” As Butch spoke, he looked at the males-only group sitting around the mansion’s dining room table. Not one of his brothers or any of the soldiers was laughing or talking loudly. The bunch of sad sack losers was just sitting in front of half-eaten plates and untouched rocks glasses of vodka, bourbon and whiskey like a roll call of bassett hounds who’d lost their anti-depressants. Not what he’d expected to find as he came late to Last Meal. When Marissa had texted him and told him she was working with the females on something, it had seemed like a good idea to with your sac or something?” Wrath inhaled like he was about to break the news of a death in the family. “They’re having a movie night.” Butch rolled his eyes and went over to his chair. Yeah, it was a little weird to sit down without his Marissa by his side, but for crissakes, it was nothing to go Prozac over. Besides, he was glad his woman had friends in the house— “They’re watching Magic Mike ,” someone said. “Is that a children’s show?” He sat back as Fritz put a heaping plate of lamb in front of him. “Thanks, man—oh, thanks, yeah, I’d love a drink. I’ll take a Lagavulin on the rocks—” Butch stopped talking as he realized the entire table of males was looking at him. “What?” “You haven’t heard about Magic Mike ?” Rhage demanded. “No.” He leaned back again as his drink was delivered. “Thanks. Is it like Barney?” “It’s about strippers,” Hollywood countered. Butch frowned and lowered the glass from his lips. “I’m sorry?” V came in from the pantry with a thick pouch of tobacco, a pack of rolling papers, and a scowl like somebody had stripped his favorite sex toy of its batteries. “Naked,” Vishous muttered as he sat where Marissa should have been. “Buck-ass naked. And they’re humans. Christ, it’s like being shown up by a pack of dogs.” “In thongs,” someone else bitched. “Dogs in thongs.” Butch followed through on taking a drink this time, swallowing the burn, welcoming the heat in his gut. Okay, fine, it was a bit of a surprise to find that he kept going until the glass was empty, but hey, he had a lot to think about. On one level, the fact that his shellan was watching a movie with her buddies, even if it did involve some nakey, really wasn’t a big deal. On another level, he wanted to find the electrical box and cut the power to that part of the mansion. Then torch the DVD. And the screen. And take his mate to bed just to show her all the tricks he had over some actor in a—oh, God, a thong? “It’s fine,” he heard himself say as he motioned to a doggen for a refill. “I mean, first of all, they love us—and second, it’s not like it’s an X rated—” the thing at the fallen angel’s head. “You keep talking like that and I’ma trim your hair. With my eyes closed.” Lassiter laughed. “Yeah, whatever, big boy. I thought you had more mojo than to get worked up over something like this. You really that insecure?” “You want insecure,” V said. “I’ll make you—” “Okay, okay,” Butch cut in. “Leave it, V. It’s fine, it’s great—they’re just enjoying themselves. What’s wrong with that? It’s not like they’re sleeping with the guy.” “You sure about that?” Lassiter smiled. “You don’t think they’re fantasizing about—” The collective growl that rose up from the Brotherhood was so loud, it managed to agitate the crystals in the enormous chandelier hanging over the table. And the fallen angel was an idiot, but he wasn’t stupid. Moving slowly, like there were multiple guns pointed at him, he put his hands up in submission. “Sorry. Whatever. I’ll stop before all this lame-ass uncomfortability you bunch of morons are sporting kills me.” “Wise choice,” Butch said dryly. “Not that I wouldn’t mind hitting you right now. Although that’s not specific to this sitch.” Lassiter went back to eating, shoving food into his face. The Brothers weren’t so quick to do a reset on things, those narrowed eyes and bared fangs still trained on the angel with the big mouth. “Come on, boys, it’s fine .” He cut a piece of lamb off and put it in his mouth. “Mmm. Delish.” In reality, the stuff tasted like cardboard, but he made a show of the yummies. He couldn’t keep it up, though. Two minutes later, he was shoving a full plate away and nursing his second whiskey. “Really. They should have a little independence. They don’t need to be locked at our hips, and listen, life here revolves around us. It’s about time they do something just for them. Really. This is great.” Next to him, V lit up a fat hand-rolled. “Is it. You like the idea of Marissa looking at some other male’s junk?” “It’s not an X-rated—” As his voice squeaked, he cleared his throat. “I mean, it couldn’t be … no, it’s not—” up again before the growling got even worse. “Jesus, you guys are so damn touchy.” Butch shook his head and decided the angel was on his own. “So, yeah, I mean, a little gyrating—a pec pump or two. It’s nothing to get worked up over. Fritz, can I have a refill over here again?” The butler hustled over to pick up the empty glass. “Would any of you care for dessert? We have homemade ice cream and Petit Gâteau .” Butch glanced at Hollywood. “What do you say there, my man?” When Rhage just swished his ginger ale around in his glass, Butch cursed and said to Fritz, “This one here will have some even if no one else does.” “Bring me the dessert,” Rhage spoke up. Fritz bowed with Butch’s glass in his hand. “But of course, sire. I shall fix you a plate directly—” “No. I want the whole dessert. All of the cake and all of the ice cream.” Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd that was how Hollywood ended up with a morose audience of however many playing witness to his consuming fifteen small chocolate cakes and two gallons of vanilla ice cream. It was like watching paint dry, except there was no chemical smell and the room was the same color before and after. The good news was that the booze was doing its job, fuzzing out Butch’s mind, making his body both numb and horny. “May I have another?” he asked a passing doggen who was removing the final chocolate-smudged plate. “Thank you so much.” When his glass came back, he pushed his chair away from the table. “I’m out. I’ve got some work to do.” And no offense to any of them, but hanging around in their vibe was just making him more depressed. Any more of this and he was going to start braiding the noose. Walking out, he paused in the grand foyer. Looked up the stairs. Tried to imagine his Marissa ogling some actor in his underwear. “Really. It’s fine. Good for her.” He took his phone out and called up their text string. Hesitating, he thought he’d just send her something, you know, to about something like this. Marissa wasn’t only the love of his life; she was a female of worth who would never cheat on him. And hello , it wasn’t like she’d checked into a seedy motel with the guy, for fuck’s sake. She was hanging with her friends just like he hung out with his. This was ridiculous. He was not the jealous type— The sound of shitkickers approaching had him glancing over his shoulder. It was Rhage, and the brother had a frothing glass of Alka-Seltzer in his hand. Hollywood looked up the stairs. And dollars for dipshits, he was thinking exactly what Butch was. “I’m going up,” the guy announced. “Now, wait, wait, wait.” Butch grabbed that huge forearm and squeezed. “It’s not like you can just burst in there.” “Why not?” “It’s girls’ night.” “So I’ll put on a dress.” “Fucking hell, Rhage. Really ?” Next out were V., John Matthew and Tohr. And everyone else, including Wrath—and even Manny, who, in spite of being a full-blown human, was right there along with the hound-faced rest of them. “We are not going up there,” Butch announced. “We’re going to go play some pool, and get drunk, and talk about all the kills we had in the attack on Brownswick. We’re going to have a great fucking night—day, whatever the hell it is. Now pick your balls up off the floor and let’s start behaving like men.” “He has skills. I’m just saying.” As Doc Jane spoke up, the captivated audience that was focused on the big screen was in total, very unmuted agreement. Payne let out another of her now-trademark wolf whistles. Xhex cursed and threw more Milk Duds at the image, yelling, “Damn, son, you get that shit! You get it!” Marissa just laughed again. She couldn’t decide what was more amusing, the movies or the company—probably the company. Although the humans were not hard on the eyes, she had to this hard. There was something about being with the girls that made the jokes both worse and better at the same time, and the giggling louder, and the silliness more stupid. All of which was a very beautiful thing, as it turned out. It also reminded her of how great it was to be accepted for exactly who she was, no external expectations laid on her, no shortfalls she hadn’t volunteered for cutting her down. No judgment, just love. Plus a number of naked guys who were almost as hot as her male? Not a hardship. When the final scene was over and the credits started to roll, they clapped like the actors could hear them all the way out in California. “Can you teach me how to whistle like that?” someone asked Payne. “You just put two lips around your fingers and blow,” the female replied. “Isn’t that a line from a movie?” somebody chimed in. “Are they going to do a third one—” “Magic Mike Ginormous—” “We need to watch one and two again first as prep—we’ve got a tradition to uphold—” “Anybody see Nine and a Half Weeks lately—” “What’s that—” One by one, they stood up from the padded leather recliners and stretched in the dim, windowless room, backs cracking, shoulders unknotting. And it was funny—Marissa felt the urge to cut through the conversation and say something profound and meaningful, just to acknowledge the space they’d been in. But the right words didn’t come. Instead, she said, “Hey, can we do this again?” Then again, maybe that was exactly what she meant. Well, what do you know, the peanut gallery was so on board: The rousing cheer was as loud as the hoots at the dance scenes, and the idea that this special time wasn’t a one-off made her feel a piercing kind of relief. “I think we need a Chris Pratt marathon next. Guardians of the Marissa wadded her empty Milk Duds box and made a rim shot with it into the trash. Abruptly, she realized that she couldn’t wait to see Butch—and not because of all the scenes of half-naked bodies. She missed him—which was ridiculous, considering neither one of them had gone anywhere. Heading for the door by the glass display of candy bars, she was smiling as she pushed open the— “Dear … God,” she blurted as she recoiled. The hallway beyond was filled with the males of the house, the Brothers and other fighters and Manny sitting on the floor with their backs to the bare walls, their legs stretched out, propped up, crossed at the knees or crossed at the ankles. Apparently there had been quite a bit of drinking going on, empty bottles of vodka and whiskey littered around them, glasses in hands or on thighs. “This is not as pathetic as it looks,” her Butch pointed out. “Liar,” V muttered. “It so fucking is. I think I’m going to start knitting for reals.” As the females emerged with her, each one of them registered shock, disbelief, and then a wry amusement. “Is it me,” one of the males groused, “or did we just perform our own mass castration out here?” “I think that just about sums this shit up,” somebody agreed. “I’m wearing panties under my leathers from now on. Anyone joining me?” “Lassiter already does,” V said as he got to his feet and went to Jane. “Hey.” And then it was group-reunion time. While the other pairs found one another, Butch smiled as Marissa came over to him and put out her hand to help him off the floor. As they embraced, he kissed her on the side of the neck. “Are you out of love with me now?” he murmured. “’Cuz I’m pussy-whipped?” She leaned back in his arms. “Why? Because you pined after me while I was watching a dirty movie with my girls that wasn’t all that dirty? I think it’s actually—and brace yourself—really pretty cute.” “I’m still all man.” As she rolled her body against him, she let out a mmmm as she and that meant a trip all the way downstairs, into the tunnel, and through the underground passage to get back to their bedroom. He wasn’t going to last that long. Not even close. The first available vacancy with any privacy came in the form of an unoccupied staff bedroom that had pulled drapes, a twin bed with no sheets on it, and a very handy brass lock. Butch didn’t bother turning the lights on; he just pulled his female against his body and kissed the ever-loving crap out of her as he kicked the door closed and worked that dead bolt like a pro. “I need you so bad,” he growled. “You’ve got me,” she said against his mouth. Fucking perfect, his cock roared in his pants. And talk about following orders: with a quick shift, he backed her up to the bed, sat her down and knelt in front of her. As he inhaled deeply, he started to laugh.“What?” she murmured, all half-lidded and wholly edible. “You’re aroused.” “Of course I am.” “You weren’t when you came out of the movie.” “Why would I have been? That was just good fun with the girls. Like going to a museum, you know? You appreciate the art, but you wouldn’t take it home with you.” “So I’m still your favorite flavor?” “You’re my only flavor.” Well, didn’t that make him go all robin-breasted, dick swing with the ego. Flashing his fangs, he said, “Now, that’s what I’m talkin’ ’bout.” “Were you really jealous?” she said. “Of a movie?” “Yes.” The laugh that came out of her was so easy and relaxed, such a happy sound, that it made him hope she and her girls got together again and, yes, to watch sexy humans gyrate on the screen, if that was what made his mate uncoil like this. Granted, he wasn’t about to write that Tanning Chatum guy a fan letter, but he was more than grateful for those females and that friendship. Anyone, anything that took care of his shellan was all right in body down on the little bed. He had a lot of plans that involved him going down on her for two hours—but his cock wasn’t going to be able to wait for all that. He needed in her. Now. Zeroing in on the fastening of her slacks, he had her naked from the waist down with some quick hand work and one pull down her long, lovely legs. And then his palms were traveling up her calves, her thighs. With a moan, she spread further for him as if she wanted this as badly as he did, revealing her bare, glistening sex—and that was when he lost his damn mind. Outing his erection, he went right for the heart of her, no preamble, no foreplay—they were both beyond ready. “Marissa,” he groaned as he penetrated her, sliding in deep, the sensation at once familiar and bracingly electric. Cursing on the exhale, he reared up and his hips took over, grinding, thrusting, pumping—and he loved how she held on to his neck and shoulders. “Take my vein,” she ordered. His fangs had already punched out of the roof of his mouth, and he bared them with a hiss. Striking in his favorite spot, on the left side, he drew deep, drank hard, got high on her taste as well as the sex. He couldn’t last long with that, though. Shit was getting too hard, too fast down below. Licking the puncture wounds closed, he repositioned her so he could go even deeper—then he grabbed onto her hip bones and dug in, pistoning her body, rocking things so hard the thin metal frame banged into the wall and the tinny mattress springs became a symphony of wild creaking. He heard her come, which was what he’d been after, heard that common, nothing-fancy name of his erupt into the sex-scented air—and he wanted to stop so he could feel that rhythmic gripping of her core. He was too far gone, though. His balls were tucking up and going hot, his pelvis was doing that autonomic jerking shit that he was no more capable of reining in than he could stop his own heart, and his cock was that bizarre combination of numb and hypersensitive— Butch came so hard he got a load of fireworks across his vision, and even as he started to ejaculate, he knew he wasn’t finished. He kept riding her, shifting positions again, arching farther over her body until his weight was braced on the balls of his feet floor. But again, there was no stopping. He just walked along with it—until the frame fit itself obligingly into a corner. Talk about some leverage. Fucking. Perfect. Butch kept going at it, pounding her, his body doing an uncoiling of its own, the weeks—and maybe, if he was honest, months—of feeling somewhat separate from her disappearing like he was fucking that subtle distance out of existence. Lot of orgasms. The fantastic ugly kind where your face screwed up hard, and you were going to be sore when you woke up, and shit got really, really messy down below. When it was finally over, he collapsed on top of her. He meant to roll over, though, so she could breathe easier. He really did. Yup. Rolling over would be good right now. Uh-huh. In three … two … … one.

Blood Kiss JR Ward
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Touch the Dark somewhere part 4 around the first trip to Dante’s

So, earlier I said that the first trip to Dante’s on the first night that Cassie finds out about the Pythian power is going to be called spot one.  Its important that this distinction be made because here is the long and short of it.  These books are about Cassandra Palmer a 20 something clairvoyant who was raised inside a low level vampire’s court with very little training in magic.  She doesn’t know it at the beginning but she is a super special snowflake.  She inherit’s the power of the Pythia, the supernatural world’s arbiter of disputes and protector of the time line.  The Pythia’s draw their power from Apollo and are clairvoyant so they can know when to intervene in the time line to insure that it is protected. For over 2000 years, the pythian court has been attached loosely to the silver circle, a body of mage’s who try to keep the world safe and battle the Black Circle.  The Silver Circle thinks they control the Pythian court, but the Pythia’s have long been secretive and have kept many of their powers secret.  The Pythian power is somewhat sentient and the current heir Myra has been lured to the dark side by Rasputin, the evil vampire trying to change the world order and he has a bunch of people on his side, from the Black Circle to some of the vamps, weres and others who are unhappy with the current state of things.  One of the vamps who have joined Rasputin is Tony, who was in Mircea’s line and raised Cassie.  Tony has been especially bad- he is working with Rasputin to kidnap witches right before they were fated to die and sell them into sexual servitude to the light fey.  But on this night, the Pythian power has started to transfer and part of it has come to Cassie, the daughter of the last heir and a mage who worked for Tony.  Cassie took off before she found out what the senate wanted to try and get info on her parent’s from Jimmy the rat who Tony had kill them.  She went into Dante’s to try and find Jimmy before he is killed for going against Tony and finds him in a basement cell.  Tony is not one to let an opportunity to make a buck go by, so he has a fight club in the basement for when he wants to get rid of people.  Jimmy is slated to fight a were pack whose leader he killed for Tony.  When Cassie finds him in the cage, there is a pixie, Radella, who is trapped as well.  She tells Cassie she was able to find the witches, but got caught and that she needs to free her.  Cassie doesn’t know what Radella is talking about and Radella realize’s that this is not her Cassie.  Regardless, Cassie isn’t going to leave anybody, so she frees Radella, Jimmy and three witches-one of whom is Francoise who she saw burned alive when she went back in time as

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.  Jimmy makes a run for it and Cassie tries to catch him and runs into trouble in the parking lot.

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, Tomas and Pritkin are there to bring her back to MAGIC.  She is trying to get Billy Joe to possess Jimmy so she can find out info on her parents.  Jimmy’s pack of were rat/ satyrs is there and there are vamps around the parking lot who work for Tony. Tomas grabs Cassie and Louis-Cesare tells hi to take her back to Magic.  Cassie objects and Pritkin says he will take her.  Tomas picks Cassie up and takes away her gun.  She tells him she has been looking for Jimmy for years, but Tomas ignores her.  She tells Billy to go into Jimmy quickly because she is afraid of what’s about to happen.  Billy Joe goes into Jimmy and rockets back out of him and into Cassie, but unlike what usually happens he pushes Cassie out of her body and her spirit goes into Tomas.

Cassie/Tomas looks down and sees Billy Joe/ Cassie in his arms.  Jimmy bites Tomas/Cassie and Cassie throws him across the parking lot.  Cassie sees everyone in slow motion.  Pritkin fires at where Jimmy was causing an explosion and turns to meet the rat things.  

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is moving in regular motion and he skewers a rat and yells at Tomas to take Cassie out of there. Cassie is confused and looks down to see a rat sneaking up on her body.  

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throws a knife and skewers it in the throat.  Cassie figures out that she is in Tomas.  Billy Joe in Cassie calls out “Cassie where are you?” as he panics. Cassie in Tomas looks at her body and asks “who are you” and touches her body.  Billy Cassie says to stop that.  Cassie says who are you who is in there.  Jimmy comes back at Cassie in Tomas and Cassie shoots him but he keeps coming.  She shoots him again and Jimmy says to call off her gorilla or she will never find her dad.  Cassie/Tomas ssays what but Jimmy says he isn’t talking to him.  Jimmy looks at Billy Joe in Cassie’s body and tells her that they can make a deal.  Tony will never tell her the truth he likes where Rog is too much.  Cassie Tomas says my father is dead Jimmy says he isnt talking to Tomas.  Cassie Tomas looks up to see that Louis-Cesare and Pritkin have killed most of the were rat things and are making short work of the others.  The vamps are standing around watching and Cassie doesnt get that at all.  

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calls out tomas behind you and jumps toward cassie/tomas.  Cassie picked a bad moment to get distracted and Jimmy capitalized on it grabbing Billy Joe/Cassie.  

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is furious with Tomas saying he told him to get her out of there.  Cassie/Tomas is more worried about the claw Jimmy has to Billy Joe/Cassie’s throat.  When Billy Joe starts cursing Cassie figures out that he is in her body and tells billy joe to shut up.  Billy Joe is relieved to have found Cassie as he thought maybe she was dead and finding her in Tomas is a relief.  Cassie decides to deal with one problem at a time and asks Jimmy what he wants to let her go after telling Billy to shut up.  

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tells Tomas he has screwed up enough and he will take care of this.  Cassie/Tomas tells

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to shut up which freaks him out as Tomas should not be able to do that.Cassie asks Jimmy what he wants.  He says he wants to get out of this alive and Cassie is his meal ticket out of this.  Cassie tells him no way, try again.  Jimmy says he will kill her and still get a reward from Tony.

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says if he does that it will take him days to die.  Cassie Tomas tells Jimmy

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is right if Jimmy kills Cassie then they will just kill him.  Jimmy says that the alternative being that he lets her go and they kill him anyway doesn’t work for him.  

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says that there are many ways to die.  Cassie Tomas tells him to shut up again.  

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tells Tomas he doesn’t know what is wrong with him but they will talk later.  Cassie tells him he really doesn’t know.  She smiles at Jimmy but Tomas’ fangs are fully extended.  Cassie Tomas asks Jimmy to give up Cassie and they will give him a 2 hr start and even distract Tony’s vamps who she has figured out are there to finish the job if Jimmy gets away.  Jimmy says that they would say anything to get Cassie back and then just kill him anyway.  Cassie Tomas asks since when do were’s take orders from vamps and says she cant believe hes been toadying to tony all these years.  Jimmy tells Tomas that there is a new world order coming and vamps may be taking orders from were’s soon.  Cassie Tomas back tracks as she wanted to prick his pride not goad him into something stupid. She tells him that that wont matter if he’s dead from this fight.  She asks him if he will take Cassie’s word on it.  Jimmy looks torn and Cassie Tomas realizes that the shot to his chest nicked his lung.  Jimmy is running out of time and when he figures that out she’s out of time.  She realizes she can smell Jimmy’s fear.  This makes Cassie realize she can smell everyone’s emotions and its distracting/  

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is way past mad and is furious a simmering peppery scent that is coming off him in waves that seem equally directed at Tomas and Jimmy.  “It was mixed up with the myriad scents suddenly hammering me from all around: the faint, far-off whiff of the sewers running beneath the earth, diesel fumes and cigarette butts from the parking lot and the reek of sauerkraut from a day-old reuben in a Dumpster. My body, on the other hand, smelled good, really good, and at first I thought it was because it was familiar. Then I realized with a shock that it actually smelled like a favorite meal, hot and fresh and ready to eat. I had never thought of blood smelling sweet, like warm apple pie or steaming cider on a cold day, but now it did. I could almost taste the blood running under the warmth of that skin, and feel how rich it would be sliding down my throat. The idea that I smelled like food to Tomas staggered me to the point that I didn’t see what happened in front of me until it was half over.”  A Suffocating cloud of blue gas surrounds Cassie Tomas,

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, Billy Joe/Cassie and Jimmy.  

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tells Pritkin to stand down .  Shots ring out and Cassie Tomas eyes begin to burn.  As she gets ready to go into the cloud of gas to try and save her body, Billy Joe Cassie comes crawling out crying and gasping for breath.  Cassie Tomas can’t figure out whats wrong until she realizes Tomas doesn’t need to breathe and hasn’t been since she has been in him which causes him to start hyperventilating.  Billy Joes Cassie graps Cassie Tomas around the feet and starts crawling up saying Help.  Cassie Tomas asks Am I ok and drops down to check her body saying tell me you didn’t let me get cut up! Her body seems fine except for a thin wound at the neck and watering eyes.  Cassie tells a confused Billy Joe to stay her and goes after Jimmy after pulling up her shirt so her breasts stay in.  Pritkin is yelling something but Cassie can hear too much in Tomas’ body and so she goes into the blue cloud to try and get Jimmy, but he is down.  

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comes into the cloud and says something and Cassie says he better not be dead but then Louis-Cesare reaches out and grabs Tomas Around the throat so hard it would kill a human.  As soon as

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touches Tomas though Cassie is thrown back in time, although this time as a spirit and with Tomas along!

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Life is hard. Dying’s easy. So many things have to align to create life. It has to happen in a place that supports life, something approximately as rare hen’s teeth, from the perspective of the universe. Parents, in whatever form, have to come together for it to begin. From conception to birth, any number of hazards can end a life. And that’s to say nothing of all the attention and energy required to care for a new life until it is old enough to look after itself.
Life is full of toil, sacrifice, and pain, and from the moment we stop growing, we know we’ve begun dying. We watch helplessly as year by year, our bodies age and fail, while our survival instincts compel us to keep on going– which means living with the terrifying knowledge that ultimately death is inescapable. It takes enormous effort to create and maintain a life, and the process is full of pitfalls and unexpected complications.

Dresden Files, Ghost Stories (via theeyeofterror)
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Touch The Dark Reread Part 1

Cassandra Palmer has had a rough life.  She is in her mid-twenties and on the run from Vampires.  When she returns from her dinner break at the travel agency, someone has changed the wallpaper on her computer to her obituary in the next days paper.  She is going to be killed in a little over an hour.  Before she runs, she has to let her roommate know why she’s leaving.  Cassie is a clairvoyant and talks to ghosts.  On her way to the club where she sometimes tells futures, she runs into one of the resident ghosts of Atlanta, Portia.  Portia is a southern belle who died before she made it to her wedding.  Cassie asks Portia if she has seen Billy Joe.  Billy Joe is a bad gambler from the 1800′s who got caught cheating and was killed, but luckily he had won a truly horrific gemstone necklace from a countess the week before and the gem stored residual energy.  The gem was enough to keep Billy Joe around and when Cassie came across the necklace at 17, she started giving him life energy so he could help her.  Portia hasn’t seen Billy Joe, but says she and her friends will enjoy playing lookout.  

Cassie was raised by Tony, a 3rd level master vampire, who ran the Philly mob.  He used her visions to make money, and had killed her parents when she was 4 because they objected to Tony raising her.  Cassie took off at 14 and did pretty well as a street kid but came back to get Tony taken down by the FBI for his illegal dealings with no mention of vampires.  Then she went into Witness Protection for a while, until she saw the death of her handler and couldn’t convince the marshal service to take her seriously.  

Cassie’s roommate is Tomas, a gorgeous young man who she met through the street kid program where she volunteers.  He has been living with her for 6 months and has made some sexual advances, which horrified Cassie as she was just trying to be nice.  She gets to the club and tries to tell Tomas she has to run.  He says he is coming with her and says he has to tell her something, and they duck into a storeroom.  5 master level vamps come in after them.  Somehow, Cassie and Tomas make it through the fight.  Tomas ripped out two of the vamps hearts out.  He uses the metal shelving unit to impale another one.  Cassies ward takes care of one and a group of Ghosts explodes the other.

Cassie has a vision of Thomas when he first becomes a vampire, causing her to panic.  Here she thought she was doing something good, and he turns out to be a master level vampire.  She has seen him in sunlight.  In order to keep her from leaving, Tomas dances with her and lightly kisses her neck and then her.  He is clearly being affected by his proximity, and he begins to kiss her for real.  He lifts her to his waist with the suggestion that she not fight him.  And he starts back for the storeroom.  His power surrounds her and he manages to have a pretty steamy sex scene with her and then he gets her to give him the gun.  He has her go to sleep.

When she wakes up she is in a waiting room.  The Oracle (newspaper for the paranormal) is several months old and has the headline of “Pythia’s heir missing: time out of whack”.  Raphael (yes that Raphael) tells Cassie that Tomas was assigned as her bodyguard by the senate.  And the betrayal is bothering Cassie.

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Wicked Girls

Wicked Girls

Wendy played fair, and she played by the rules that they gave her;
They say she grew up and grew old – Peter Pan couldn’t save her.
They say she went home, and she never looked back,
Got her feet on the ground, got her life on its track.
She’s the patron saint priestess of all the lost girls who got found.
And she once had her head in the clouds, but she died on the ground.

Dorothy just wanted something that she could believe in,
A gray dustbowl girl in a life she was better off leavin’.
She made her escape, went from gray into green,
And she could have got clear, and she could have got clean,
But she chose to be good and go back to the gray Kansas sky
Where color’s a fable and freedom’s a fairy tale lie.

Dorothy, Alice and Wendy and Jane,
Susan and Lucy, we’re calling your names,
All the Lost Girls who came out of the rain
And chose to go back on the shelf.
Tinker Bell says, and I find I agree
You have to break rules if you want to break free.
So do as you like – we’re determined to be
Wicked girls saving ourselves.

Alice got lost, and I guess that we really can’t blame her;
They say she got tangled and tied in the lies that became her.
They say she went mad, and she never complained,
For there’s peace of a kind in a life unconstrained.
She gives Cheshire kisses, she’s easy with white rabbit smiles,
And she’ll never be free, but she’s won herself safe for a while.

Susan and Lucy were queens, and they ruled well and proudly.
They honored their land and their lord, rang the bells long and loudly.
They never once asked to return to their lives
To be children and chattel and mothers and wives,
But the land cast them out in a lesson that only one learned;
And one queen said ‘I am not a toy’, and she never returned.

Dorothy, Alice and Wendy and Jane,
Susan and Lucy, we’re calling your names,
All the Lost Girls who came out of the rain
And chose to go back on the shelf.
Tinker Bell says, and I find I agree
You have to break rules if you want to break free.
So do as you like – we’re determined to be
Wicked girls saving ourselves.

Mandy’s a pirate, and Mia weaves silk shrouds for faeries,
And Deborah will pour you red wine pressed from sweet poisoned berries.
Kate poses riddles and Mary plays tricks,
While Kaia builds towers from brambles and sticks,
And the rules that we live by are simple and clear:
Be wicked and lovely and don’t live in fear –

Dorothy, Alice and Wendy and Jane,
Susan and Lucy, we’re calling your names,
All the Lost Girls who came out of the rain
And chose to go back on the shelf.
Tinker Bell says, and I find I agree
You have to break rules if you want to break free.
So do as you like – we’re determined to be
Wicked girls saving ourselves.

For we will be wicked and we will be fair
And they’ll call us such names, and we really won’t care,
So go, tell your Wendys, your Susans, your Janes,
There’s a place they can go if they’re tired of chains,
And our roads may be golden, or broken, or lost,
But we’ll walk on them willingly, knowing the cost –
We won’t take our place on the shelves.
It’s better to fly and it’s better to die
Say the wicked girls saving ourselves.
Written on: 2008-05-09. Seanan McGuire

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✨ Mental Health Starter Pack for Times of Change ✨

postitforward:

Change can be scary. It can be difficult, overwhelming, and affect our mental, physical, and emotional health in all sorts of ways. Whatever you’re feeling right now, you definitely don’t have to feel it alone. Below is a list of resources and self-care tips to help make life a little bit easier. And if you don’t need them right now, pass ‘em along to a friend who might.

Got more tips? Reblog and add your favorites to the bottom, or make your own post and tag it #postitforward so we all know where to look.

Resources

  • National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: Available 24/7 at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
  • Crisis Text Line: Free, 24/7 support for anyone in crisis. Text START to 741741.
  • IMALIVE: Chat confidentially with a volunteer trained in crisis intervention.
  • 7 Cups of Tea: Speak anonymously with a trained active listener.
  • NAMI: Dedicated to improving the lives of anyone living with mental illness. Free to chat at 1-800-950-6264.
  • Trans Lifeline: Dedicated to the well being of transgender people. USA: 1-877-565-8860. Canada: 1-877-330-6366.
  • The Trevor Project (@thetrevorproject): Confidential suicide hotline for LGBTQ young people. Available 24/7 at 1-866-488-7386.
  • The GLBT National Help Center: Provides LGBTQ people with free and confidential peer support at 1-888-843-4564. Youth Talkline: 1-800-246-7743.
  • It Gets Better Project (@itgetsbetterproject): Communicating to LGBTQ youth around the world that it gets better.
  • To Write Love On Her Arms (@twloha): Dedicated to helping people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury, and suicide.
  • American Psychological Association: A resource for finding mental health care in your area.
  • NEDA: Help and support for people struggling with eating disorders. You can call 1-800-931-2237 or chat with them online.

Self-Care Tips

  • Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it.
  • Remember to be kind to others and yourself.
  • Drink plenty of water and don’t forget to eat.
  • Get enough sleep.
  • Have a movie or TV marathon.
  • Read a good book. Start a new series.
  • Read the #positivity and #postitforward tags on Tumblr.
  • Draw something or color in a picture.
  • Take a bath or long shower.
  • Write your thoughts down in a journal.
  • Turn your feelings into art. Make crafts.
  • Bake or cook something you like.
  • Go for a walk. Have a dance.
  • Watch a funny video.
  • Light your favorite candle(s).
  • Listen to your favorite music.
  • Take deep breaths. Try meditation.
  • Talk to a friend, a loved one, or someone you trust.
  • Make a list of things that bring you happiness. (This really works!)
  • Do some of those things! See those people!

Sometimes the first step is the hardest

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